Usha Anandi. 6 | MAY | 2020
Today when I woke up I felt so much heaviness. In a much slower fashion than usual, I gathered the strength to get up out of bed and onto my mat to practice.
As I arrived on my meditation cushion and closed my eyes it became clear; my body was far from normal.
Rather than open my eyes, get off my mat, check my phone, call a friend, or run away – I decided to do the one thing my whole mind was telling me not to, stay.
I decided to get curious and start to look around at what was happening inside.
My awareness traveled throughout me as I took inventory of all the different parts of my body.
My toes felt tense. My inner thighs were gripping and holding onto something. My stomach felt tight and my shoulders were heavy. I explored my entire body until I landed in the one place that seemed to need my attention most of all – my heart.
As I gathered my energy into my chest, I felt a huge, gaping hole in the center of my heart.
What could it be? I inquired.
The answer came loud and clear – grief.
It’s no denying that right now we’re all experiencing our own unique version of loss.
That’s why this month in our virtual monthly membership, I’ve invited my good friend Patty Bueno to come on as a Guest Teacher. Patty is a Grief Counselor, Teacher for the Dying Consciously Foundation, and Ceremony + Ritual Guide.
To receive Patty’s Embodiment Practice and access a live ceremony + lecture with me, click the button below to join us.
Depending on our situation, this grief might be at the forefront of our daily experience or it may feel like a distant achiness that we can’t tie to a specific cause.
Maybe you’ve lost a loved one or someone close to you is sick.
Maybe you’ve lost a job and are grieving the potential for income and abundance.
Maybe you’re juggling staying at home with family, taking care of kids, and working at the same time.
Maybe you’re just grieving the loss of normal and grasping for a kind of certainty you’re not sure will ever exist…
Grief is a skill that we must be taught; it’s learned.
In colonial culture, we are taught ways to hide from our emotions. We’re taught to bottle them up and stuff them down in attempts to get over them to not disrupt forward-moving ‘progress’.
Our ability to meet ourselves in the depths of our own pain carves a deeper well to hold the healing power of love.
We can mentally understand all of these things and still, grief can be hard.
It feels like no matter how many losses I’ve experienced in my life, when another one arises I momentarily throw my hands up and look up towards the sky and say “Seriously?! Again?!”
Luckily I have amazing people in my life who hold me, support me, and accompany me through processing my grief.
One of those people is my beloved friend Patty Bueno. Patty speaks about grief in a masterful, inclusive, and profoundly healing way, which is why a few months ago I asked her to do an interview with me.
This interview is specific to people who have experienced miscarriage or abortion but is STILL so relevant for those who are experiencing any kind of grief.
And although we had no idea that the pandemic even existed at this point, I think you’ll agree when you listen, this interview has such POTENT tools that you can start using today.